Why the Best Leaders Step Back


Hi Reader,

Not long ago, a senior executive I coach told me she felt like she was “carrying the whole company on her back.”

Her days were filled with back-to-back meetings — strategy calls, one-on-ones, project reviews — each demanding a different version of her attention. She was exhausted, but more than that, she was frustrated. “I hired good people,” she said. “Why does it still feel like everything depends on me?”

It’s a familiar story. Our modern leadership culture rewards overcommitment and confuses control with care. We step in to help, and somewhere in the process, we take everything on. What starts as support quietly becomes overload.

The hidden cost of good intentions

When I ask leaders to describe their teams, they usually talk about structure — departments, functions, org charts.

But structure alone doesn’t create a team. A true team is defined by shared purpose and interdependence. It’s a group of people who know why they exist together, not just what they do side by side.

In one organization I worked with, the executive team was struggling with conflict and silos. Everyone cared deeply about success — they just saw it differently. We brought them together to define their own ground rules: the “Keep It Up” behaviors they wanted to reinforce, and the “Cut It Out” behaviors they agreed to stop.

Six months later, the CEO reached out to me and shared what happened. The team collectively decided that one member wasn’t living by those shared norms. They approached the CEO, explained their reasoning, and agreed to part ways. No resentment. No top-down decree. Just alignment and ownership.

That’s what happens when people build clarity together — accountability becomes organic.

Read more about it in my book CLICKING

The leadership paradox

Here’s the paradox: the harder you try to help your team, the more you risk holding them back.

Leadership today isn’t about doing more for people. It’s about creating the space where people can do more for themselves.

That means stepping back, not stepping away.

It means letting others make decisions — and mistakes — while you hold the boundaries of trust and purpose.

Building teams that click

In my work, I guide leaders through five pillars that turn groups into self-sufficient, high-trust teams:

  1. Clear purpose – Define why you exist together.
  2. Linking connections – Strengthen relationships within and beyond the team.
  3. Integrated work – Agree on how you communicate and decide.
  4. Collaborative decisions – Distribute authority, don’t hoard it.
  5. Knowledge sharing – Learn collectively, not in silos.

These pillars are simple, repeatable practices I describe in my book CLICKING that help teams think together — not just execute faster.

And finally

As I wrote in my previous newsletter, the role of managers is changing — and much of it is thanks to AI entering the workplace.

But this shift isn’t just about technology. It’s about how we lead.

The best leaders will stop trying to carry their teams and start building teams that carry themselves.

They’ll measure success not by how much they control, but by how much trust they create.

Because when people feel ownership and clarity, they don’t wait to be led — they lead together.

And that’s what makes any team — and any future — truly work.

See you next Thursday

Daria


P.S. I was honored to be a guest on The KAJ Masterclass LIVE podcast, where I shared stories and practical examples on how to build self-sufficient, high-trust teams in the era of AI. You can watch it on YouTube.

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Meaning Makers

A no-nonsense newsletter for busy leaders who are done with overwork and ready to scale smarter. Join a community of 11K+ leaders and followers across platforms getting concise, actionable insights on leadership, team building, and how to use AI and hybrid intelligence to make work easier—so you can earn more, go home earlier, and lead with purpose without burning out.

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